Category Archives: Life

The Comeback

It’s been a long, long time. Can’t tell how much I missed blogging. I was taking some time off to give a push to travel writing and starting my very own travel venture (details of which I will be sharing soon!).

A lot has happened all this while. Moving my base from New Delhi to Singapore is the most significant one. I hope the move increases my exploring journeys in South East Asia (fingers crossed!). Singapore is an amazing city and precisely a reason for my comeback. I want to resume my everyday writing that will focus on living in Singapore. So, watch out for all the interesting posts on food, people, places, travel, shopping and much more.

Can’t wait to begin and hear from you guys!

 

 

Advertisements

How often do you get attached to something inconsequential, something as insignificant as a torn old boarding pass.

I discovered a 2 month old boarding pass to Auckland in my bag and since then it’s been serving me as a bookmark to the current book I am reading – Among the believers – an Islamic Journey by V S Naipaul. I don’t know what joy this boarding pass gives me, I can easily choose a nice glossy bookmark from the collection I have but no..this is special. May be this reminds me of my first holiday with my husband.

I was on my way back home at the same time on the same train with same book and same boarding pass. The train was packed; I could feel the person at my back breathing on me. Nobody expected, they could fall in so much crowd, but the driver proved us wrong. With one sudden short jerk everybody toppled and there goes my boarding pass. It took me a minute to realize that I had lost it. I was looking at the floor so anxiously people thought I lost something expensive. And started searching too! I gave up after much hunt. But every now and then my eyes would roll down to see the glimpse of it. Alas, I thought it was better to let it go. As I was ready to get down at my station, an old woman lifted her foot and voila!!, there it was. Indiana Jones wouldn’ have been that happier. Quickly I picked it up, got down and comfortably placed it on page number 398.IMAG2494

Marriage – the state-of-the-art – Affair

And when you start thinking you are lonely, you are not lonely at all.

Hello peeps, I have been away for quite a long. Well various reasons…got married, traveling and in the process writing got sidelined. Hoping this post becomes a new beginning and never stops.

I know marriage is a change process as it brings a lot of changes in a person’s life. I am somebody who gets unsettle even if order of the things on my bedside table changes, you can imagine my apprehensions during the course of this life event.
However I feel much better now, finally getting used to of “Marriage” and I have deduced that it’s not such a bad thing. Demanding for sure but not evil.

I have a list of both good and bad changes that has happened to me. Let’s start with the bad ones.

  • No time No time No time. I get no time for myself for sure. But I figure as days will progress time will also find its own place.
  • Cooking. As in have to cook good food. No shortcuts. This is still something I am ready to learn since it is important for survival.
  • Lack of creativity. I have become such a duh. I used to think like an artist – reading and writing, now I can only think if an orange vase will look good on my green table!! This is something that bothers me again but I guess time will heal this too.
  • Act too good to be true. I am a good person but still a bitch. And now I have to act extra good to people even when I am in my worst mood. Can’t show my schizophrenic side that soon.

And the list will just go on with very annoying elements…

The good things of the package are though quite cherish able and therefore blur the above bad things.

  • Patience. It takes time but it comes. Well, it is important to run not only marriage but life…peacefully.
  • Forgiveness. I am still one of those grumpy cats but I am learning to forgive and forget. I was not born Jesus.
  • Less cribbing. You suddenly have to learn to appreciate things even if they don’t fall in your book of approvals. But that’s the way of life. Perhaps my book is not the only right book in this world.
  • Love. Unconditional love. It is easy to be cordial and maintain healthy relationships but maintaining unconditional love is difficult but it’s the most beautiful thing to experience. It gives me a high.

Marriage is a balance between good and not so good things. And I feel it takes quite a lot to maintain this balance. Phew!! I am still learning and hope not to regret from it.

What is wrong in Prostitution?

Who doesn’t desire to be rich. But would you prefer it at the cost of your dignity?

This thought is often discussed when a female does something immoral that is refuted by the society. My post is referring to a recent high profile prostitution racket busted in the southern India. This racket involved many established and aspiring film actresses and models and businessmen. The scandal has become the talk of the town not because prostitution is illegal in India or it was appalling for a close minded Indian society to read something like that. In fact, it is not the first time that a scandal of that sort has been exposed. The limelight of the scandal became a National Award Winner actress who showcased her talent on screen brilliantly at a very tender age. The actress, who is still young has admitted that she did it for money since nobody would hire her in the movies, she rather chose a dark alley to reach to her destination.

A lot of people have a different perspective on the whole situation. Most people said that it is sad to see the destiny of a National Award Winner but she could have done something else, why skin business! Sure, this was not the last option on the earth. Agreed.

While others and that includes mostly females, opined that while reading this story, it is repelling how the media is extending only the character of the actress in the malicious gossip and nothing on the high profile businessman found with her. I am sure she wasn’t making out alone! Nor she was forcing herself on him. This one sided limelight is not justified.

I agree with the second opinion, but more than that I want to know what is wrong with prostitution. If a female who tried every righteous act to earn money, but has failed to do so, uses her body to earn money, what is so catastrophically wrong with it? It’s her body anyway. Yes, it may not be morally right for some people, but to hell with them. I would agree with such upright people if they had supported her with monetary help. I am sure no female goes into such repelling business willingly, unless she has an insatiable sexual appetite, but when she is caught, it is only her who is called names. Have you heard people talking about why did the man do such thing. As if they were born with this right of ‘could not be questioned’. If a female chooses her body to be used in an unpleasant fashion, no matter how wrong it is, we must understand it is still her decision. The least you can do is to understand what got her into this and pull her out of this quagmire, rather than pushing her further.

Prostitution is a very sensitive topic. You may have totally contradictory views from me, but come to think of it who are we to decide what is right and wrong. Since, we have not dealt with those desperate times, we will not get what makes wrong things look right. It is not the time to judge when people will always be judged wrongly.

INTO THE LABYRINTH

Like a racing horse,
Thoughts are sprinting
Amongst is a thought,
To find a moment
And rein in,
The checkered mind

Sigh!
As that moment arrives
Realization dawns,
And I find myself
Into the labyrinth.

Is it just me or do you also go through the phase when you get a train of thoughts which keeps you in a knotty state for days? At times there is so much going on in your mind that you lose track of your trajectory and feel stuck like a person in the middle of the gridlock. One way, which I find easier to follow, is to become blasé to the whole situation and shrug off.

Not sure how credible it is, but it sure works 🙂

Beyond opinions – an alternative view on unhealthy relationships

Not always you enjoy healthy relationships around you. Sometimes it gets really difficult to put up with people in such scenarios. Most of it is clearly because people don’t see beyond useless arguments. They can go on and on bickering about the issues without any logical conclusion. From what all I have seen and learnt as lessons, discord is not always due to difference in opinions, but there are countless reasons which we certainly overlook during frictions. I can pat myself for being a highly open-minded person who always looks beyond mere opinion differences.

I usually have altercations with my mom. Often I think, how can someone fight with me so much even knowing how much room I give to healthier ways of dealing with a problem. But anyway, so when there is an argument, I don’t just see it as a result of different point of view, but I am also ready to believe the biological side of it.  Females being a more emotionally vulnerable gender, clearly are synonyms to ‘Nagger’. Well, I am a female myself and not patronizing them (or us). Men term women as cranky, complaining, nagger which undeniably is all true, however, at times it is not under their control since they go through hormonal turbulence all their life in forms of mensuration, pregnancy, then menopause causing not only physical stress but mental too that vents out by picking up fights.

Well, it’s not only women, I have come across something as Male menopause too! Yes, do you see a lot of above 50, grumpy males around you who do not show happy signs, male menopause could definitely be one of the reasons. Like females, males also undergo subtle hormonal changes that makes them prone to irrational behavior.

Similarly, we often overlook other possibilities of belligerent or argumentative way of a person before tagging them as “not-meant-to-live- together”.  Ever heard of Bipolar disorder which causes mood variations?  Gone are the days when this was a disorder of rich and famous and lonely movie stars. A doctor once told me a ratio of bipolar disorder is 1:5 in India!. Many of my colleagues complain of erratic behavior of elders in their homes who knows that it is Bipolar to be blamed for all of this.

In short, when you observe a certain behavior of people like picking fights, constant badgering, coldness etc. It may have got to do with any of the above. So, before judging them at least give a thought on the biological side of it and find a solution. Else, just treat yourself with quarrels everyday.

A brief tryst

It started as a very ordinary day for me. Same running to catch a metro to work, carving my way in the crowd of zillions and at the same time strutting on those imbalanced heels. I usually walk fast during the rush hour in mornings, without looking left and right like a horse with blinkers. So, I was already running late and in those late mornings I can even ignore a Hurricane. While I was proceeding towards my next interchange of trains, my feet struck a baby shoe. A small kid of less than an year was being carried by his mother, the shoe must have got dropped in that hustle-bustle.  While he was looking at his shoe wanting to tell his mum about his lost treasure, his mother was completely oblivious of the situation. Suddenly, he saw me coming close towards him. He made a desperate glance at me and the next towards his shoe. That innocent face immediately softened the robotic me. I picked up the shoe and extended my hand to give to him, he did the same with an appreciating smile but co-incidentally his mother made a swift move inadvertent of this secret meeting. I walked further to give the boy his shoe but his mother was making equal steps as me. In this long chaotic walk, the kid was the most desperate soul. Seeing this misery, a third person stopped the mother and pointed towards me. With a satisfactory expression the mother left with the shoe while the kid still facing towards me, had an overwhelming smile.

A brief love affair can happen anywhere and anytime.!

 

 

 

 

LOVE ONE ANOTHER

LOVE ONE ANOTHER
Love one another, but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup, but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread, but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone.
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart.
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.
-Khalil Gibran
A very practical poem by Khalil Gibran which holds meaning in all eras. What I understand from this poem is Love is good, however, too much of it is smothering. We like being around people who care for us and love us, but the moment that love starts chasing us as our shadows, it puts our existence in obscurity. An important lesson taught here by the Lebanese poet that love each other, respect each other but do not make your heart and soul dependent on each other.